Sometimes, you have to get out of your head to get sanity.

Today, I’ve decided to share an email I received, and offered my guidance not only for the dear writer who reached out to me, but to any of you struggling to decide “what should I do next?”  I’ve changed some of the facts, just to protect this dear writer’s privacy.

“Dear Susan:  I’m 27 years old and I am very lost and feel like my life is going nowhere. I earned a university degree in religious studies  in 2006 and since then the only jobs I’ve ever done have been temping jobs in the government, have done a total of 5 temping jobs and the longest of which have been 6 months! So in total I’ve only worked about a year in total and so been out of work for a total of 5 years. I have suffered with depression and anxiety. I lack motivation and drive. I just can’t seem to decide what I want to do with my life.

And what’s more it feels like I’ve tried everything. I’ve seen career counselors, spoken to career advisers, done career tests, written down all my interests and skills, and done voluntary work — all in an attempt to make a decision on doing something, but I still can”t figure out why I seem paralyzed and unable to move on with my life. The voluntary roles I had I just simply lost interest in. I’m someone who gets bored very easily. I just feel so hopeless and sad every day as I already think it’s kinda of too late to do some things. The bottom line: Right now I feel a huge sense of urgency as I need to make a decision to do something without wasting any more time.

What can I do, based on my limited experience? What options do I have?”

Thank you,
Mary

Can you identify with this letter?

My response is not about: Another career test. Another internship or volunteer position. Nor do I prescribe a visit to the psychiatrist for antidepressants.

Here’s my response:

“Dear Mary:  Thanks for being in touch. My heart goes out to you. And when I listen underneath everything you’ve said, my sense is that you’re putting a lot of pressure on yourself. You know, everyone finds their path at their own speed, despite what school and companies and society try to dictate. It seems really important to reduce the anxiety.

Deep down, you have a knowing inside of you about each of your next steps. Trust those steps one at a time. No need to rush. No need for urgency. Really a need to hear yourself, I believe. I encourage you to experiment with processes that teach you to hear yourself, like meditation, or perhaps a moving meditation, like the 5Rhythms, or a practice called Sensory Awareness.

Using your mind and your logic to constantly “figure it out,” is overrated, in my humble opinion. I was stuck for a long time not knowing what I wanted. Then, I found body-centered psychotherapy and body-centered practices, like the 5Rhythms and while it was not linear, it lead me to my inner wisdom. I encourage you to drop the needing to know what you need to do for the long run, and start trusting your short-run instincts and impulses.

I wish you well in just being with yourself in a patient, totally compassionate way,
Susan”

Is this reply what you expected? Were you waiting for a list of assessments and tests for Mary to take? Would you have sent Mary to a psychologist or psychotherapist? What would you have suggested to help Mary?

Personally, I think that we in the Western world are a deeply disembodied bunch. We don’t remember our childlike impulses to listen within ourselves. We look outside of ourselves, to a candy store full of luscious life and career choices. And without ever taking a bite, we instantly get sick to our stomachs. That’s because we make ourselves ill when we look for personal answers outside of ourselves.

We’ve forgotten how to mine the delicious treats within. We have lost our memory for how to find our way with our best way-finding equipment:  our senses. I’m a huge believer in waking up the body’s wisdom, in all facets of our lives. Your body connects you to your intuition, your instinctive wisdom, that sense of your next steps.

So, what are you doing to wake up your inner wisdom?
Susan

PS – One of my personal favorite tools for waking up my own inner wisdom? I consult the “Get a Move On!” cards I created. They’re my favorite tool for getting unstuck.

After graduating from Fordham University in 2006 with a master’s degree in counseling and personnel services, she took a job as a vocational and mental health counselor at a community center in New York City. She liked the career counseling aspect of it so decided to try her hand at recruiting two years later. But with the economic slowdown, her job became more administrative than she would have liked, so she jumped at the chance to volunteer in Israel.

Six months later, she’s back in the Big Apple pounding the pavement once again for a job in college counseling. But it’s been a frustrating process for the 29-year-old.

“I’ve looked for school jobs online, e-mailed private schools directly, contacted people I didn’t know,” Susman told WalletPop in a telephone interview. “Some of my fellow graduates have also had no luck.”

What happened?   Read the full article from WalletPop

Do you ever dream of having your own radio talk show?

Well, I confess, that’s one of my dreams. I’d have a call-in show on a big radio station. I’d listen to people’s problems about wanting better work, about dealing with stress on the job, about figuring out how to make important work-related decisions, and about how to project more confidence to colleagues and clients. Gosh, that would be so much fun, to help people, one-by-one,  shape their success. At work, we often lack guidance for how to be ourselves and have an impact in the world. People might call me the “Suze Orman of Careers,” although I find her a bit grating. I’d have more of a dose of my smiling high energy, like the woman I resembled in the 1980s, gymnast Mary Lou Retton. Well, maybe a little less cute. A bit smarter. I do have an MBA and a PhD, after all.

Well, I’m moving in that direction, creating plans for a radio show down the line. Sure, I could create one right now, on a channel like Blog Talk Radio, on which I’ve been a guest. However, my aspirations are bigger. XM Radio or Sirius, or maybe CBS. And TV? That would be great, too.

For now, I want to give you the best of me, Dr. Susan, through my blog and website. It’s a great way to get myself ready for a radio show. Besides, I get asked tons of career-related questions every week, and I realize how often I want to share the advice I give one person with a whole bunch of people.

So, I’m excited to welcome you to use the Work from Within blog to ask YOUR questions. And I can answer them. My intention is to respond to at least one question weekly, and be as helpful as I can, sharing what it means to “work from within,” and helping you to achieve the calm, clarity, and confidence that’s possible when you listen to and trust your embodied intelligence.

Do you want to ask a question? Go ahead!  Here’s the link:  http://www.workfromwithin.com/resources/askdrsusanthanks/

C’mon, Ask Dr. Susan! I promise to be kind, supportive, and upbeat. I’d love to read your questions…and, of course, answer them.