I love telling happy stories. And this is one of them, about one of my former clients.

It’s delicious, too. Your mouth might start watering, so you’re forewarned…

Back in September of 2008, I hosted an event called “Follow a More Authentic Career Path“  and invited six people who’d made major career changes to talk about how they did it. (In fact, you can order the audio of the event here and listen to Ande’s wisdom, and five other career changers).

Ande Scheinker was one of the panelists. Ande had been an event planner. Hated it. She wasn’t sure what was next when she came to me as a client. Over time, she decided to call herself a “culinary explorer,” because she so loved being in the kitchen and being around food. She baked. A lot. Sometimes, she’d send me pictures of her creations. This was both fun and troublesome. Her pictures can make you drool. Worse, they can ruin a diet, unless you have iron-clad willpower. I don’t.

Ande was, like many clients, worried that she wasn’t changing careers fast enough. I wish I had a dollar for every time someone tells me, “I’m moving too slowly in this transition.” I’d have enough…to buy a car maybe? No, probably not. But still, I want to say “No, no, no. You’re making this transition on YOUR timing. YOUR rhythm. YOUR pace. Just keep listening inside, and you’ll sense what’s next.”

Last week, I received an email from Ande:

Hi Susan,

I hope this email finds you well!  I wanted to update you on a few things that are going on with me…I have some exciting news.

First – I’ve enrolled in pastry school.  I’ll begin a six-month pastry course at Tante Marie here in SF on March 29th.  I’m really thrilled about this next step – it just feels really right.

And for fun, I wanted to tell you that I’m competing in the upcoming edition of SF Food Wars.  This time around, the theme is chocolate cookies.  Fun, fun!  I just found out I was accepted to compete today.   Here’s a bit more info: http://sffoodwars.com/2010/02/the-chocolate-cookie-situation/

I’ve actually never even attended any of the SF Food Wars – but I hear they’re a blast.

Anyhoo – just wanted to drop you a line to let you know that things are going well on my end.  Hope all is well with you.

Thanks for everything,

xoxo Ande

Yes, this is a real email. I share it to make a few points:

First, almost everyone I know has fears of making change, and to be successful, you have to work through those fears. Ande’s had plenty of fears, including the fears that what she cooked would not turn out well. Amazing. Take one look at all the cooking she’s done, and you’d wonder how someone like Ande can even have that fear. Well, she’s just more accustomed to just being with the fear than ever before.

I was reminded by my friend, Tarra Christoff, that “Success is just outside your comfort zone.” To me, that means that you have to give yourself permission to feel a bit uncomfortable, awkward, goofy, confused, if you’re going to be able to navigate changes. You know, if you’re used to being all neat and tidy and organized (like I tend to want to be), then you’ll have to relax the tension you place on yourself to do things “just right.”

How can you demand of yourself that you do something well (or fast) if you’ve never done it before? Sounds silly when you’re standing outside the experience. But when you’re in it, you really can push hard on yourself.  Be gentle with yourself. Tell that part of your mind that’s criticizing you to take a break. It’s not helping. Really.

Second, change takes time. Duh. Yeah, you know this. But most of us only know this intellectually. Are you impatient with yourself? Do you tell yourselves to “hurry up?” and berate yourself when you’re going slow? Please be good and gracious with yourself as you get insights into “what’s next.”

Third, the important thing, as you navigate change, is to keep following your energy gains. It’s a huge gain for Ande to bake. So, over time, she’s taken baking classes and done tons of experiments in her own kitchen. One of my energy gains is writing, and I’m finally, finally, past the dissertation and am writing a book proposal. (Hmm, did you notice my judgment about how long it’s taken me to get over my dissertation?).

What activities or situations fill you with energy? How can you give yourself more time to experiment along those lines?

I’m really energized and excited to taste Ande’s latest creations at The Chocolate Cookie Situation on March 21st in San Francisco.  Mmm…but, too bad, tix are sold out.  Maybe you can view Ande’s Twitter stream and see if she knows about some special way to get more? In the meantime, you can drool over her cookie (and other) creations on her Flickr stream…oooh….aaah….mmm…

Congratulations, Ande!

Scrumptiously yours,

Susan

Just found this quote today, from Marcus Aurelius, last of the Five Good Emperors of the Roman Empire: 

That sums up how I feel about life coming together when you work from within.  The optimal way to navigate change and chaos, as I see and feel it, is from within. Rely on yourself, on your inner wisdom.  And, as the sage Marcus Aurelius advised, "dig still deeper & deeper" to touch that innate, embodied intelligence.

May you find hope as you look within,
Susan

Susan Bernstein, MBA PhD
Coach, Author, Speaker
www.WorkFromWithin.com
It all comes together when you work from within

“I got a job!”

I love those words. Especially because I’m so sick of hearing all the employment reports that are filled with gloom and doom. Words and phrases like “crisis,” and “massive layoffs,” and “unprecedented increase in unemployment” are more than a downer.  They induce hopelessness and defeat.

So, out of my utter frustration, and because I am bound and determined to be a ray of hope for people in their job search, I am taking a stand for the positive. It’s time to celebrate.  It’s time to share the good news.  We all need some encouragement!

I ask you, if you have gotten a job, or if you know someone who’s gotten a job, to please post your story (as a comment) here.  Include your name and the job you got.  And how you feel to have your new job.

By posting that “I got a job” and sharing a little bit about it, not only will you be able to brag, you’ll be able to help job seekers to know that it’s still quite possible to get a job.

So, please do share your “I got a job!” stories here.  Your success can have a positive impact on a lot of people.

Thanks!
Susan

Susan Bernstein, MBA PhD
Coach I Author I Speaker
Work from Within, LLC
www.WorkFromWithin.com
It all comes together when you work from within

Do you wish you could be smarter about navigating
through change and uncertainty?

For some people, life feels like a rollercoaster of
ups and downs. The economy skyrockets and drops. Our working r elationships go hot and
cold. Our attitude towards our careers
rises and falls.

Even though we can’t predict these shifts, thinking
about them takes up a ton of mental space.

Then, on top of it all, to save our jobs and
preserve our precious reputations, we try desperately to keep up a frantic
pace. We feel compelled to respond to every request within in a nanosecond or
less.

Does all this overstimulation seem like it’s just
going to wrestle the optimism right out of you?

Life loses it’s joy when you become oversaturated
by the push, push, push of constant change and the nag, nag, nag of
uncertainty. That’s just mind-blowingly
exhausting.

Guess what?

You don’t need to lose your mind. There’s an antidote. There’s an alternative. A healthy one.…

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I certainly don’t want to say everything that’s on my mind.  But sometimes, I hold back my voice.  I don’t share what I’m thinking when it might actually benefit the people around me. I resist opening up my heart.  Well, much of that withholdng is unnecessary.  It’s brought to you (and me) by the chattering of voices that don’t align with who we are and what’s meaningful for us.

A nagging little voice inside my head loves to chastise me about all the activities and to-do’s that I HAVEN’T done yet.

Do you also have one of these voices?

I’m sharing the story of transforming my voice so that I might help you speak out about what matters to you. To do that, you need to create more positive, uplifting, supportive voices in your own mind and heart.  I hope reading my story shows you how you can do that for yourself.

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I’d love to write something more lofty today…but I’ve been touched by this quote for over two weeks, so I want to share it:

“It’s not because things are difficult that we dare not venture. It’s because we dare
not venture that they are difficult.” – Seneca

This past winter, I found myself toiling and pushing myself.  Even feeling kind of depressed.  I’d rather be pulled to do work I love, to express myself, not depress myself.  Turns out that I was resisting the pull of my true love, the work that truly energizes me.  I was hiding it from myself, and making my life more difficult.

Thankfully, my dear friend, Karen Moss reminded me that I always light up when I speak in front of an audience.  She’s right.

So I am daring to venture more into public speaking over the coming year.  Hear me roar!  Actually, come hear me and learn how to Recraft Your Career from the Inside Out at the Bay Area Organizational Development Network’s 2009 conference May 2nd in Berkeley.

I’ll leave you with a question to explore:
If things are difficult for you, what might you venture into?  What adventure could you create for yourself?

Adventurously yours,

Susan

Dr. Susan Bernstein
Coach, Speaker & Author
(hmmm…Speaker, Author & Coach?)

www.WorkFromWithin.com
Work From Within, LLC

Moms have more options than ever in terms of the ways to work.  And, that also means they face more complexity in their choices.

Fortunately, Sharon Reed Abboud is helping moms to lay out their choices, with her new book, “All Moms Work.” I met Sharon virtually through LinkedIn.  I can’t recall if she found my profile, or if we met in a her “All Moms Work Group,” honestly, but it doesn’t matter. We’ve been exchanging emails for a few months now.  A few days ago, I actually got to hear her voice across the miles in Virginia, near Washington, DC.  She’s a bit soft spoken and humble for someone with her talents in career advising and the wealth of knowledge she’s amassed about all the combinations and permutations open to mothers in today’s American workplace.

I want to recommend Sharon’s book to mothers, whether they’re working or staying at home, because you never know when when you might want to — or more likely, need to — go back to work. If you’re a stay-at-home mom, how do you stay current on workforce issues?  How do you decide when to go back to work?

And when moms decide to work full- or part-time, how do they juggle their lives?  How can they ask for flexibility?  And how do they maintain it?

Sharon has interviewed outstanding experts to gain perspective and shares the stories of inspirational moms who work full- and part-time for companies, and those who’ve started their own entrepreneurial ventues.  I see her book as a sort of “soup to nuts” complete approach to helping moms sort out the thorny issues of when, how, and where to work.

I’m not sure how much longer they’ll offer it, but Sharon’s publisher, Capital Books, is offering 35% off for pre-orders.  I’d encourage you to order now, so you can save.  But even if you miss out on the discount, Sharon’s got meaningful, totally useful advice to share with moms, to make your working life easier.

Here’s to all moms who work!
Susan

Dr. Susan Bernstein
Coach, Speaker & Author
www.WorkFromWithin.com
Work From Within, LLC

I'm sorry.   I've been out of touch.  I've felt a little sad that I haven't been writing this blog in weeks.  This isn't the only communication channel that I've neglected. I've also missed sending tweets from my Twitter account. 

In the midst of this creative cyclone, I'm totally caught in the round and round motion of a whole new landscape of thoughts and ideas.  For now, I happen to be immersed in the murky waters of a not-yet-clear soup that I'll call "mind-body-spirit transformation soup."  I'm not sure of all the ingredient.  I think some are missing.  I have a bunch more possible limp bits of goo I could add, but I wish I had more formed, delicious morsels to serve up.  Somehow, I sense I'm cooking up a stew.  It's not ready for tasting, but it's getting close.  A nasty, nagging naysayer in my noggin,' who reminds me of a Siberian grandmother (complete with kerchief), but with a Bronx accent, chides me:

I look askew and reply "Hey, I'm in process!"  I get kind of defensive. I have to be forceful with this nagging naysayer.  Her logic is strong.  I do need money. (We all do, of course) I get nervous when her voice shows up in my mental missives.  She reminds me of everyone who's been asking:

"What are you up to?" and "Well, what's that new direction your business is taking you?" 

I translate all of that into greater pressure to produce — now!  The nagging naysayer is telling me now, as I write this, "You should be writing something else."  In my mind's eye, I am clothed in white temple garb.  I look back at her, bow, and reply:

"Thank you.  But the blog calls.  I want to write it.  I also want to work on the the workbook.  Just not now."

She shakes her head, some of her hair tumbles out of the kerchief as she rolls her eyes and remarks, "Whatever." 

I know she's sarcastic.  She doesn't sincerely want to accept "whatever" I want to do. She's not OK with my choice. But I choose to ignore her for now.  It's time to trust my instincts and desires.  I know it in my bones. 

My precious Soul Motion dance teacher, Zuza Engler, this past Tuesday night, shared some lines of poetry that feel fit for sharing.  These words help me to understand who I am, even in the midst of change.  They are about "the thread," that goes through my life.  You have your thread, too.  So does everyone.

I thought you'd enjoy these words, this poem.  Especially when you can't quite articulate to others where you're going or what you're doing, may these words give you comfort.

The Way It Is

There’s a thread you follow.
It goes among
things that change.  But it doesn’t change.
People
wonder about what you are pursuing.
You have to explain about the
thread.
But it is hard for others to see.
While you hold it you can’t get
lost.
Tragedies happen; people get hurt
or die; and you suffer and get
old.
Nothing you do can stop time’s unfolding.
You don’t ever let go of
the thread.

~ William Stafford

I wonder how that poem touches you?

Weaving my world with yours,
Susan

Dr. Susan Bernstein
Coach, Speaker & Author
www.WorkFromWithin.com
Work From Within, LLC

This morning felt a little nutty, with a client emergency, a cell phone that kept dropping calls, and a washing machine that made an awful sound. In the midst of all of this, I realized I hadn't had breakfast yet! Ooops!  Ever had a day like that?  How did you stay upbeat?

Fortunately for me, I was able to stay positive and motivated because I had a phone call already planned with Kyra Cavanaugh, from Life Meets Work. We set up a time this morning to talk about what's happening in the economy, and why we think that there's actually a lot to be happy about and how people can stay positive and upbeat, even when the Dow is down.

We've had so much fun talking with each other over the few months that we've been acquainted, and realized we had a ton of inspiration and education to share.  So we planned to record a friendly conversation to share with our readers (now, listeners). 

I hope you enjoy listening as much as we enjoyed sharing our ideas, which include:

• Opening up to new job possibilities, so you don't get locked in by your industry or function
• Finding flexible work options (Kyra reminds us that those are more attractive than ever)
• Doing what's important to keep your job or get a new one
• Ways to do contract work
• The positive good that's being created in our current economy
• The need for cooperation and community, instead of competition

We'd both love you to post your comments. This creates community, fosters conversation, and lets us know what else we can provide for you.

Happy listening!
Susan

Dr. Susan Bernstein
Coach, Speaker & Author
www.WorkFromWithin.com
Work From Within, LLC

Yesterday, I spent a relaxing morning amidst the gentle rain and whispy fog at Green Gulch, a beautiful Zen retreat center near my home.  My friend, Tarra Christoff, invited me to hear author Marc Lesser give a talk about his new book, Less:  Accomplishing More by Doing Less.  Marc reminded me of the illusion that everything is permanent.  When the market for homes was going up, up, up, new home buyers were being told, "Don't worry about your mortage, house prices always rise."  And right now, it seems that the market psychology is all about how "it's just going to get worse and worse."

Well, a major tenet of Zen Buddhism is that the nature of everything is actually impermance. Everything changes.  Marc related a story of feeling a pain around his heart and feeling dizzy, like he would go unconscious, and leaping up from the couch.  His wife noticed this leap and asked him what happened.  He'd experienced pain, and in a flash, he evaluated his life, and realized he could die.  Luckily, Marc didn't have a heart attack.  But he did have a good reminder that we assume that we'll breathe one breath after the next.  But we might not.

I think this lesson of impermance is so important as we weather this economic uncertainty.  First, to know that everything changes.  So, eventually, the market will adjust upwards again.  And it will come down again.  It's uncertain when.  And that's unsettling

So, what do you do if everything can change in an instant?  Do you hide under a rock?

Well, I guess you could do that.  I've never understood how you hide under a rock, but I now know you can hide inside one — in a cave house.

But I'm off track here when I talk about hiding under rocks and in caves.  Distractions tend to accompany uncertainty, as you try to fish around for more certainty.  And, you see, my little distraction is a "head trip," meaning that I got my mind involved.  What I think is really crucial in standing strong and flexible in the face of uncertainty is to access your embodied intelligence.

"OK, Susan," you say, "Cut through the California New Age mumbo jumbo and tell me about accessing my embodied intelligence.  And how's that going to help me weather uncertainty?"

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