Last night, I went to the gym. I almost didn’t feel like I had a choice. The non-stop rain here in the Bay Area is getting to my mood. Sorry, but I grew up in the Phoenix area. Still have desert blood in me. So when the clouds hang low, dark, and gloomy, I find it harder to stay upbeat. Getting my endorphins pumping gives me a boost of positive energy for at least 8 hours.

I heard the rain pick up at about 5:40 pm, and knew I needed to dash to my car to make the 6 pm spin class. With no traffic, the drive takes me 10 minutes, but in rush hour, it can be 15, and even 20 with bad weather. So I grabbed my backpack, filled it with biking shorts, a tank top, and a pair of socks, and figured I’d change in the dressing room.

Because the spin room holds only 20 bikes, you have to grab a number if you want a bike. I arrived and grabbed number 20. Whew. I’d made it. I was safe.

I changed my clothes, and then went to grab my running shoes (I still haven’t bought biking shoes, the clip in kind, despite some advice that I’d get more out of the class). “Where are my sneakers?” Hmm…oh…crap!

In my rush to get out of the house, I neglected to bring appropriate shoes. No, I was not going to try to bike in a pair of knee-high boots. Argh! My blood pressure started to rise. Just then, my friend Catherine walked up. She was leaving the gym. She wondered why I looked so steamed. I had not been in the sauna — the flush on my face was the tell-tale sign of anger. Catherine told me she would have given me her running shoes to wear, but she had been swimming and didn’t have any. I laughed at the thought. My shoe size is 4 1/2, but I can wear a 5. Hers is 8. Hmmm….

“Hey, why don’t you borrow my shoes?” came a voice moving around the corner. A very gracious woman, Michelene, offered her size 6 Sauconys. “You can cycle in these.” I realized I didn’t need perfect fitting shoes for pedaling, especially with the toe cages on the bike. I couldn’t believe her offer. My feet don’t get that smelly (well, the scent is just perfume to me…yeah, right…), but I was just incredulous. Michelene was firm and supportive, “I know how hard it is to not work out. Please, borrow these. You can leave them at the front desk and I’ll get them tomorrow night.”

“Wow, wow, thank you. OK, yes, having some shoes for the bike would let me get my sanity back. What can I do to thank you?” I asked.

“Just pay it forward.”

I think I had the most idyllic spin class, ever. I was high as a kite, fueled by the generosity of a stranger. I joined my gym because I found it more like a community, not just a place to sweat. Michelene proved to me that community works. She must know something about being a team player. I asked her for her business card so I could be in touch and thank her, and it turns out that she’s the Director of Sales & Finance for Parties That Cook. I was floored. I know about her amazing company. One of my clients has been dabbling in culinary explorations, and I suggested she check out Parties That Cook, which puts on corporate team building cooking events — they cook up camaraderie!

But I digress.

When I finished the spin class, I changed clothes and went to the front desk, “I have a very important favor to ask of you,” I told Julie, the assistant who manages the guests. After conveying what had happened, and how important that it was that the shoes stay at the front desk until Michelene picked them up, rather than going to the lost and found bin. Julie beamed and said, “You made my day with that story. I’ll call Michelene and let her know, right now, that her shoes are safe. That’s so generous of her. Wow, that’s really incredible.”

I know. I feel it in every bone in my body, every inch of my tissue. My heart is uplifted and is pumping much more smoothly. My head is clear.

Thank you, Michelene, for your kind spirit. You made my day.

Yes, I’ll happily pay it forward. And remind my dear readers to do so, too.

Hoping you’ll help someone else step up and make their best moves,
Dr. Susan Bernstein
Life/Work Transition Expert
www.WorkFromWithin.com

I love to give gifts! With or without fancy wrapping paper and bows, it’s the thrill of watching people’s faces and watching their smiles, hearing their excitement, and just generally being around delight.

Well, I would like to give YOU a gift. If you’re thinking about attending the “Crafting Careers That Truly Fit” workshop I’m teaching from January 15-17, 2010, at the gorgeous Esalen Institute, in Big Sur, California, I have an added bonus when you register:

Register by Wednesday, January 13, and you will receive a FREE 30-minute coaching session with me after the workshop. You can use the session up until February 28th, 2010. If you had to pay for this out of pocket, it would cost you $135, so think of it either as a $135 discount, or a great added value. Most importantly, I trust that this session will help you to accelerate what you discover during the workshop, so that you’ll be able to make your next career move with more calm, clarity, and courage.

So, let me share with you about what you’ll learn and discover in this interactive workshop:

• You’ll illuminate what’s important in your future career
• You’ll replace ill-fitting social norms about “work” with visions of what you truly desire
• You’ll brainstorm ways to create meaningful work
• You’ll get clear about your next steps to pursue work that truly fits you.

I’m ending this offer at midnight (you’ll need to register with Esalen before then, by calling 831-667-3000) on Wednesday, January 13, so take action now. You’ll be glad youve done this for your career, your sanity, your body, your mind, and your spirit!

Oh, so how do you get the free coaching session? All you need to do to get that benefit is to email a note to tell me that you’ve paid for the workshop through the Esalen Institute. Drop a  me a note at info @ workfromwithin.com by December 31 to get this wonderful bonus.  To register for the workshop, simply go to this link for workshop details, and you can either register online, or you can can call the Esalen Institute at 831-667-3000 from 9 am – 7 pm Pacific Time Monday through Friday, or 9 am to 5 pm Saturday & Sunday. Or click here for more contact information at Esalen.

If you are craving clarity about what’s next in your career, and you want to get back in touch with yourself and craft work that truly fits you, then, I’d love to have you join us in beautiful Big Sur for this workshop.  Please feel free to contact me if you have any questions about the workshop, and I’ll be happy to help you see if it’s a fit for you.

Happy to give YOU your gift…as you discover your own inner gifts!

Dr. Susan Bernstein
Life/Work Transition Expert
www.WorkFromWithin.com

On Monday, a close friend confided in me: “I can’t seem to get started with work today. I’m so caught up in remembering all the parties I went to, all the cool people I met, all the sleeping late that I did, and I feel really draggy.” She seemed pressed to change her situation.

I do understand. I spent part of my break in a dance workshop at the Esalen Institute, and it was soooo relaxing (FYI, did you get my gift to you of 16 seconds of serenity, from Esalen, where I’ll be teaching a workshop on Crafting Careers That Truly Fit from January 15-17, 2010?). Going back to the emails and client sessions and planning was a whole different energy.

Back to my friend (and this has been important for me, too). I reminded her that many, many people take the last week of December off from work. They catch up with friends, putter around the house, reminisce about good times over old photos, and generally move at a different rhythm compared to their working lives.

Work has its own pacing, and it’s generally different from the ways we would live our lives if we didn’t work. We go to meetings on time (hopefully), we answer emails and phone calls (typically as they arrive, even if that’s not optimal for productivity), and largely operate in rhythms that have to do with meeting deadlines (why don’t they call them life-lines?).  This is quite different than who we are during vacation time.

So, if you’re having a tough week of getting back to work, and find yourself daydreaming, should you beat yourself up? Well, that’s optional. In fact, I’d say it’s unnecessary. Instead, I want to offer a compassionate reframing. I encourage you to think of the qualities you felt in yourself during vacation.  Perhaps you experienced fun, joy, ease, play, or some other characteristics. I invite you to consider how you felt during vacation, and jot down a few adjectives to describe your inner state.

Then, look over that list of adjectives and ask yourself, “What could I start, stop, or continue doing in my work that would allow me to cultivate that quality?” For example, if you experienced a great deal of fun during your vacation, you might want to add that quality at work. A few ways to do that: Take a “play” break with your colleagues. Make finishing each of your daily tasks into game, and see how fast or how easily you can do them. Create a friendly competition with a co-worker.

Instead of berating yourself for wanting to re-experience all the great aspects of your vacation or free-time away from work, I encourage you to consciously cultivate those qualities in your work. You might even write a few of those meaningful words, like “Joy, Ease, Play” on a card or sticky note, and post them where you can see them at work, as a reminder that you want to live life with those attributes.

I’d love to hear what happens when you honor yourself in this way at work this year. Drop me an email at info @ workfromwithin.com or reply here on the blog.

Happy 2010!

Dr. Susan Bernstein
Life/Work Transition Expert
www.WorkFromWithin.com

Being a creative spirit, I wanted to come up with something innovative and wonderful to share with all of my blog readers as a New Year’s gift.

So, while I was relaxing at the gorgeous Esalen Institute (in Big Sur, California) an innovative idea popped into my mind. I could give each of you the gift of serenity, by sharing 16 seconds of the sound of the roar of the Pacific Ocean crashing against the high cliffs where this transformational destination exists.

May I make a suggestion to help you enjoy this fully? Let out a few breaths with a deep sigh. Allow your body to be like a ragdoll, loosening up whatever tension you can, without forcing yourself to do something that your body is not yet prepared to do. Just allow yourself to feel however you feel. And then, simply take some deep breaths into your belly, and push the “play” button.

You can use this any time you need a sanity break, a new perspective, or a quick mental “getaway” trip.

And, if you like what you see, I invite you to the Esalen Institute as a destination to plan your career future, January 15-17, 2010.  You can hang out in a hot tub, and listen to this amazing ocean, and see the waves crashing, during your breaks from the workshop I’ll be teaching, “Crafting Careers That Truly Fit: How to Work from Within.” It’s a great way to start the New Year with a new career direction.  I’d love to see you there.

And wishing you a peaceful, serene New Year,

Dr. Susan Bernstein
Life/Work Transition Expert
www.WorkFromWithin.com

Since 2001, I have been relaxing and unwinding from the tensions of life by listening to the ocean and studying with great teachers at the Esalen Institute, in Big Sur, California. I had to overcome a lot of resistance and false beliefs to allow myself to visit this place that now feels like a second home for me, an inviting oasis of calm and renewal.

You see, back in the mid-1990’s, I was running around as a management consultant, flying around on airplanes like in Up in the Air, living in hotel rooms, and spending too many days in in stress-filled board meetings. During that time, I first heard of Esalen. I honestly thought it was some kind of woo-woo New Agey place, filled with people wearing tie-dyed clothes and Birkenstocks. I was scared that the people who attended this place would be hippy-dippy dropouts from life.

I was wrong. When I finally went to Esalen for my first time, at the suggestion of a dear friend and fellow management consultant, I was delighted. I was recovering from a broken marriage, poor health, a family misfortune, and the demise of the dot-com where I had worked. All that trauma happened in five weeks, and I needed a break. Esalen offers all kinds of workshops, on topics from relationships to psychology to movement, arts, and creative expression. And the setting!  Dramatically situated on the cliffs of the Pacific Ocean in scenic Big Sur, California, it offers mountains, ocean, and pure, clean air, given that it is pretty remote from any big cities. The closest major cities are Monterey and Carmel, about an hour’s drive north. This means that you enjoy a super quiet escape in nature.

Flash forward nearly nine years. After being a participant in over 12 workshops in the span of nearly nine years, I am honored to be teaching a workshop at Esalen this January, — it’s called “Crafting Careers That Truly Fit – How to Work from Within“. If you happen to be at a career crossroads, wondering “what should I do next in my career?” this just may be the workshop for you.

From January 15-17, 2010, you can join me at the gorgeous Esalen Institute, and in this interactive workshop, you will

• Illuminate what’s important in your future career
• Replace ill-fitting social norms about “work” with visions of what you truly desire
• Brainstorm ways to create meaningful work
• Get clear about your next steps to pursue work that truly fits you.

I  have a special GIFT for you! I’m thrilled to offer this workshop – and to offer a special gift to you if you register for the workshop by the end of 2009.  I’m including a 50-minute phone coaching session with me after the workshop, plus a deck of “Get A Move On!” cards.  You can get more details on this special gift here.

If you are craving clarity about what’s next in your career, and you want to get back in touch with yourself and craft work that truly fits you, then, I’d love to have you join us in beautiful Big Sur for this workshop.  Please feel free to contact me if you have any questions about the workshop, and I’ll be happy to help you see if it’s a fit for you.

Here’s to careers that fit!

Dr. Susan Bernstein
Life/Work Transition Expert
www.WorkFromWithin.com

I admire the people who come to the workshops I facilitate, like the Crafting Careers That Truly Fit workshop that I’m teaching at the relaxing Esalen Institute in Big Sur, California from January 15 to 17, 2010. It takes courage to face your frustrations with work that doesn’t fit, bravery to get clear about what you want instead, and faith to pursue a new direction. And yet that’s the space that I hold for people, to be able to have a breakthrough, to release work that no longer works, and to truly embrace a new, more inspiring trajectory. I love doing it…and it gets results.

So, what about those results? What happens for people when they go through a workshop like Crafting Careers That Truly Fit? Well, let me share with you a note that I received very recently from a participant in the October 2009 offering of that workshop.

“Dear Susan,

I wanted to let you know that I had a great experience at your workshop and am so glad I went.

Being unappreciated, overworked and underpaid is draining and discouraging and I was at a real low point in my confidence and self worth.

I had a couple of interesting epiphanies during the workshop, but doing one of them in particular not only gave me back my sense of self but completely surprised and delighted me. I never realized or I guess acknowledged my own skills, talents and accomplishments and I couldn’t believe how many I had.  So many things that I contribute and am great at. The experience filled my heart with light and pride. I walked away with the realization that I felt/feel really good about myself and my abilities deep in my heart and not being acknowledged or appreciated at work doesn’t change that.

Real, true internal validation in the purest sense is priceless.

It was also really recharging for me to be around you and all the amazing people in the workshop and spend time focusing on myself.

Thank you, thank you, thank you.”

This note warms my heart. I am so, so, so happy for the participant who wrote it. It’s true that “being unappreciated, overworked and underpaid is draining and discouraging,” and yet people settle for mediocre working situations all the time. It does take energy and effort to move out of these situations. The Crafting Careers That Truly Fit workshop is designed to:

• Help you not only become aware of what’s not working — but to transform those elements into what you truly desire.
• Give the opportunity to discover how to move from a draining career to an energizing career, and you’ll get directionally clearer on what that career might be
• Bring together your skills, talents, and abilities to form new possibilities for work
• Redefine work in a way that’s truly meaningful, uplifting, and actionable
• Get you unstuck and moving in a direction that truly fits for you

I’d love to have YOU (yes, you!) join this workshop. If you have questions, please feel free to email me at Info @ WorkFromWithin.com or contact me through the Work from Within website.

And, as a early-bird special bonus for you – if you register with Esalen for this workshop before January 1, 2010, I’ll give you a free coaching session and a deck of the Get A Move On! cards, worth over $250! Be sure to read the details of this offer, and contact Esalen (or call them at 831-667-3000) to sign up for the workshop TODAY! Take action now, so that you ensure your space. It’s a great way to start off 2010 with a new confidence about your career, your self-esteem, and your future.

Come join us & craft work that truly fits YOU!
Susan

Dr. Susan Bernstein
Life/Work Transition Expert
www.WorkFromWithin.com

Are you the kind of person who likes to start the New Year off making resolutions? Even if you’re not, you may be thinking, “You know, it’s time for me to get out of this crappy job and find something much, much better. You deserve it. If you’re feeling burned out or frustrated with your work, and you’re craving more meaning and fulfillment, it’s clearly time for a change.

But how do you actually make that career (and life) change?

Over and over again, people tell me, “I’ve taken career assessments (like Myers-Briggs) and I’ve done the exercises in What Color is Your Parachute? but I’m still stuck. I can’t seem to get moving!” Typically, they feel like something’s wrong with them. But that’s not it.

It can be hard to get moving when you feel stuck in your work. I know. I’ve been there. After my first year in management consulting, I knew it wasn’t for me. But it took me another four years to leave. I didn’t trust my instincts. I thought I was a wimp if I left — damnit I was going to muscle it out and stay, to prove myself to my colleagues. I wanted to show them that I was as good as them, as smart as them. In retrospect, that all sounds silly. But at the time, I was focused on how much effort I had put into getting into the job, including earning an MBA. I was “addicted” to the salary, the prestige, and even the frequent flyer miles (which were nearly impossible to use, because I had so little time to myself). Doing work that I was good at — but never really loved — well, I’d become an expert at that. Numbing myself out was so much second nature that I grew to expect the pounding migraines that seemed to come with working 80 to 100 hours a week.

When you do work that doesn’t fit for you, when you have to morph your true self to go to work every day…this takes a toll. You lose touch with yourself. You know you need to get out of the toxic environment, but you can’t seem to figure out what you want to do next. Or, if you know what you want to do next, you worry that you’ll never find or, or that you’ll wind up penniless or poor doing it.

So, let me share the good news!  If it’s time for a career change, and you can’t seem to get started, or you can’t seem to get clear on what’s next, there’s a way for you to get back in touch with yourself. And, you can do it in a gorgeous, relaxing setting, with an expert facilitator of transition, me, Dr. Susan Bernstein. OK, so I’m not exactly being humble here! And, you can get a special benefit just for reading this blog post.

January 15 – 17, 2010, just after the New Year, and just before the Martin Luther King holiday, I invite you to join me for “Creating Work That Truly Fits for You: How to Work from Within” at the Esalen Institute in Big Sur California. You really can plan your career future in a hot tub on the Pacific Ocean. OK, well, the workshop itself isn’t taught in the hot tubs, but you can visit the tubs between workshop sessions, and you can also eat delicious food, take morning movement classes that will truly wake you up, and you can indulge in massage as an added bonus.

And, to sweeten the experience, if you register for the workshop before January 1, 2010, I’m offering you a free 50-minute coaching session that you can use by February 28, 2010, PLUS a deck of the Get A Move On! cards I created, to help you get unstuck. That’s over $250 worth of bonuses! 

All you need to do to get that benefit is to email a note to tell me that you’ve paid for the workshop through the Esalen Institute. Drop a  me a note at info @ workfromwithin.com by December 31 to get this wonderful bonus.  To register for the workshop, simply go to this link for workshop details, and you can either register online, or you can can call the Esalen Institute at 831-667-3000 from 9 am – 7 pm Pacific Time Monday through Friday, or 9 am to 5 pm Saturday & Sunday. Or click here for more contact information at Esalen.

I’d LOVE to help you get clear about your future career. Imagine how great you’ll feel If you have questions about the workshop, please feel free to contact me.  I’d love to welcome you to the workshop and help you get clear. And, it would be great to sit in the hot tubs and chat with you during the breaks. What better, more relaxing, inspiring way to start your new year with a new, uplifting direction for your career and life?

So, sign up for the workshop NOW, and get your FREE 50-minute coaching session with me AND a deck of the Get A Move On! cards. Remember, you only have until December 31 to get this benefit, so call Esalen now at 831-667-3000 and register!  See you there!