I have a confession.

I’ve been a stress case.

That’s hard to admit. Especially since I work with people to help them come alive at work. I do love coaching people, on a one on one basis, about their work. And I’ve been feeling more and more confident about my ability to help people truly light up at work. My head and heart both trust the effectiveness and transformational value of  the unique ways that I help people to conceive of work that fits them. So now, I’m quite hungry to expand my reach and impact so I can touch more people. That has meant teaching more group programs, writing, speaking in as many venues as possible, and influencing larger groups. Doing all these new activities has involved learning how to use webinar software, getting on the phone to talk to organizations and businesses about helping them, discovering how I can best describe what Work from Within is all about, and generally stepping out in the world in a much bigger way. Most of the time, learning these new skills and approaches to marketing Work from Within and my philosophies and practices has been fun. But it’s time consuming, and I’m prone to rush myself and demand results (dare I say, money) rather quickly. I’ve been impatient for success. I want it on my timeline, darn it!

All this effort lead me from stress toward burnout. I started recognizing the shift from becoming angry and frustrated at my circumstances to feeling resigned. For example, I would try to learn how to use webinar software, and somehow I’d lose my participants into the Internet ether (oops!). I’d feel enraged at the software and embarrassed at not being a perfect presenter. Then the nasty voice of Little Miss Perfect would scream in my head, and I’d berate myself for not getting familiar enough with the tools I needed to make the webinar hum along.

Over the course of a few months, I started to think: “I just don’t know what I’m doing. I’m not a celebrity yet, like Oprah or Suze Orman. Who am I to help people learn to come alive at work? I’ve been running Work from Within for five years. So why am I not on TV yet? Why haven’t I written a book, let alone published it? What am I doing wrong? Maybe I should just give up…”

My body began to feel heavy as a boulder, sluggish as a slug, mentally foggy like the June Gloom that hangs over the Pacific Coast, and downright stomp-my-feet-and-shake-my-fist irritable.  I remembered the difference between stress and burnout. Stress is about feeling over engaged and anxious. When you hit burnout, you’re likely to become disengaged, hopeless, and depressed. I was headed for the latter. After weeks and weeks of this experience, a lightbulb went off in my head:  Perhaps my ideas about failing and taking too long to make an impact aren’t true. Maybe I’ve been seeing my circumstances through a distorted lens, a narrow angle.

I resolved to shift my energy. I’m all about maximizing Return On Life Energy (ROLE), so I knew I needed to take action to build up my energy stores. I started with getting checked out by the practitioners at the Acupuncture and Complementary Medicine clinic in Berkeley, because I love that Chinese medicine is all based on life energy (which the Chinese call qi, and which Indians call prana). It’s been a process of replenishing my energy stores. I’ve gone from depletion to stagnation to amplification to expansion. Instead of feeling exhausted and irritable, in the course of six weeks, I’m now feeling mellow, flowing, and full of ease. And filled with gratitude for my life and the beauty in the world, sensing the joy of simple things, like the warmth of the mug of my wild sweet orange tea to the playful chatter of the birds in my magnolia tree.

Something else that helped my renewal, something counterculture:  I decided to follow my body’s instinct for rest. I booked a retreat at one of my favorite places on the planet, the Esalen Institute, on the Big Sur coast (I’ll be teaching a workshop at Esalen from December 5 to 10), with it’s warming sulfur hot springs, the crash of the waves of the Pacific Ocean against high cliffs, and the magical landscape with its rainbow of flowers, stands of gracious trees and cradle of rugged mountains.

To renew myself sense of self, I enrolled in an Esalen workshop with performance artist extraordinaire, Nina Wise, who created a practice called Motion Theater, a form of autobiographical improvisation. To me, learning Motion Theater was like finding self-transformational storytelling. Our group of ten women played theatre games (like forming ourselves into shapes and riffing off each others stories), meditated (in creative ways, including with singing), stretched, danced, and learned to tell our personal stories, rich with detail and grounded in sensory experience. Most importantly, the combination of verbal and non-verbal activities re-started my energy. By immersing myself fully in play and presence, I got back in touch with myself. Hallelujah!

If you find yourself sliding into stress, catch yourself and find your antidote. And if you’re slipping into burnout, or you’ve already landed there, stop pushing yourself. Your body, mind, spirit and emotions are telling you that what you’re doing needs to shift. It’s time to give yourself a break for relaxation, restoration, renewal, rejuvenation.

Based on my week at Esalen, and my personal discoveries, I’d like to share some suggestions for shifting out of stress and burnout and back into your essence, your true self, the quiet internal place that is you, no matter what.  Please feel free to take only what feels good, and trust your intuition to modify any of these ideas so they fit you:

Rest. I can be a work machine. That go-go-go behavior got ingrained in me during my tenure in management consulting, when I sometimes worked 80 to 100 hours a week. These days, I think that’s insane. It’s all push, no pull. In other words, I used to make myself do work, rather than feeling drawn or inspired to do it. When we’re stressed, we often push ourselves hard. But that push, push, shove, move forward, go, go, go energy is only one way of being. You are not a machine. You cannot keep up an unrelenting pace indefinitely. Staying up late, working around the clock, denying yourself breaks…this is a recipe for a breakdown. Instead, give yourself the gift of rest. Of doing nothing. Or doing only those things that are pleasurable. Not just satisfying, but truly nourishing. Make the choice to feed yourself what you truly want, which very well may be peace and quiet.

Relax your efforts. Before taking this retreat, I had been working for months without a break, staying up until 11 or 12 at night to reply to emails, plan a workshop, update my website. So much effort! In physics, effort equals work. But work — as in your career, your livelihood — need not be full of hard effort, at least not all of the time. Notice how hard you are trying, and reduce the effort. Here’s one way to do this: Start by doing something that comes very, very naturally to you. Like walking. Or talking on the phone with a friend. As you’re doing this easy, natural activity, become aware of your body and where you hold tension and tightness. Then, do an activity that you don’t do so easily. Not the hardest thing, but something that you have to pay attention to do, and where perhaps you have less skill. Like for me, that’s riding my bike downhill. I have to concentrate. I’m afraid I’ll fall. I can do it, but I have not yet mastered it. How do you feel, in your body, when you do this activity that you’re still mastering? Where are you tight? Where are you loose? Your clamped jaw, your shoulders that come up near your ears…these are all signs of added effort. What can you say to yourself (like “I’m starting to get the jist of this”), and how can you modify the activity (like doing less of it, or only a portion of it, or slowing it down) and particularly your expectations of yourself (maybe telling yourself “It’s OK to be a beginner, and to make mistakes”), so that you can feel more ease?

Reconnect with people who care about you. I’ve been going to Esalen for nearly a decade now, so in that time, I’ve made a lot of friends there. Having them ask about me, getting to spend time with them, catching up…these are all nurturing. I feel seen and appreciated by people who know me. In times of stress and burnout, we need to have people around us who will support us. Who might you like to have around you to support you? You might call a friend and ask to have an hour to just share what’s happening. You could get some friends together and have a “dump your problems in the garbage” ritual, writing down what’s bugging you, reading your list aloud with feeling and emphasis, and then ripping up your list and throwing it in a collective trash can or fire. Then, make a resolution to do one thing, just one for now, that can make you feel better. And report back to the group when you’ve done it, either in person, by email, or by phone. Connect to yourself by connecting with others who are willing and able to help you regain yourself.

Spend time in nature. The rhythms in nature tend to be so different than our man-made mechanistic rhythms of cars and traffic and TV show and meetings and all the scheduled, pre-planned activities, and the constant onslaught of information. Nature is slower, organic, cycling and shifting. Nature is not like the airbrushed superstars we see in magazines and attempt to emulate. It’s raw and honest, the apple that has been pierced by a worm looking for food, the jagged leaf that’s asymmetrical, the birds that do not fly on a preordained flight plan like airliners but flit from tree to tree as they feel called to explore and as the need arises for food and shelter. Nature reminds us to slow down, to get back in touch with our innate instincts and impulses, to trust the flow of life. Immerse yourself in Nature’s rhythms, and you’re bound to have your own reflected back to you.

Turn down your mind and turn up your innate, embodied impulses. When I’m being very verbal — even if it’s replying email — I’m up in my head. And if you’re anything like me, your head can be a dangerous playground, with the broken carousel of repetitive negative thoughts and the teeter totter of self-talk alternately flinging you between self-aggrandizement and self-deprecation. I often tell people to “take the elevator down,” suggesting that they move from their heads to the rest of their bodies. Give yourself time to explore and play non-verbally. Perhaps you will put on music and just move your body in whatever ways feel good, without thinking of the moves you’ll make. You could shake your body like a ragdoll for a few minutes and shake out the cobwebs. You might slither on the floor like a snake and then roll and ooze. You could move your hands like they are talking, which is an activity Nina Wise suggests in her book,  A Big New Free Happy Unusual Life. Listen to what you need, what feels satisfying, and nurture yourself the way a mother nurtures a baby: with touch, rhythm, and movement.

Open your heart. When we’re stressed our burned out, often we’ve neglected our hearts. We are so hell-bent on achieving success, so determined to do what’s right and good, so focused on making money or getting that promotion…and our hearts are suffering from being left out of the conversation about our needs. Needs? Hah, we think, it’s needy to have needs. No, actually, it’s not. Our heart’s desires deserve our attention. Set aside 10 to 15 minutes. Get quiet and put a hand on your heart. Ask your heart, “what do you need?” Be patient, and listen to the answers. Write them down. Follow the most compassionate or most nourishing replies first, like the ones that tell you “Give yourself a hug.”

In every moment, you can add ease and joy to your life by reducing the effort, doing what feeds you, and reducing the activities and situations that deplete you. Bit by bit, day by day, your practice of minimizing your energy drains and maximizing your energy gains will deliver you into a life and livelihood that works for you. That way of living does not come from being hard and harsh with yourself, but rather from relaxing, restoring, renewing, rejoicing, and rejuvenating, as needed. It’s just what the doctor ordered.

Love from Dr. Bernstein!

Susan

On April 30, I posted a video on YouTube as part of a contest sponsored by Hay House, the publishing house started by Louise Hay, who is especially known for her affirmations and her new book, Experience Your Good Now. Hay House offers a workshop called Movers & Shakers (the next one is coming up in Toronto in September), for people who want to build a multimedia platform to bring your message to the world – like I am doing. The workshop features best-selling author and coach Cheryl Richardson and Hay House CEO Reid Tracy discussing what it really takes to create your message, get it out to the world, and do it with integrity and grace.

One of the most important things I learned at the workshop: This journey to being a mover and a shaker takes patience. That’s important for me, because I’m prone to push, push, push myself and then get discouraged when I don’t get the outcomes I desire. Cheryl didn’t sugar-coat her journey to becoming an award-winning, coach, speaker, and radio host. She told stories of her frustrations and fears, as well as her triumphs. This balanced approach helped me to put my own experiences into a more positive light. I also made some fantastic new friends as a result of the workshop, and that alone was worth the price of admission!

Well, let me get the the big story:  I  am thrilled to have been selected as one of two Movers & Shakers from the March, 2010 Movers & Shakers workshop in San Francisco. The other winner is the amazing vocal coach, David Coury. As a winner, David will host a live online event and my prize: I’ll be hosting a radio show with Hay House Radio in the Fall.

Being selected to host the radio show is truly a dream come true. As a kid, I used to imagine that when I grew up, I could be like Lucy on Peanuts, and have my sign with “The Doctor Is In.” I envisioned people coming to me with their problems, but everyday issues, rather than issues of massive depression and overwhelming anxiety and the like (we all experience those at times).

My favorite times as a coach are when people come to me with thorny career issues, and I help them break through their own barriers. It’s gratifying to watch them embrace positive next steps in high-speed yet heartfelt fashion. That doesn’t always mean a “quick fix,” but it does mean rapid relief and the intention to lead with heart, and let the mind serve the heart, rather than the other way around. So, all in all, I’m very much looking forward to hosting the radio show and taking your calls about crafting your career in a way that maximizes your ROLE, your Return On Life Energy.

I invite you to watch my video entry, and also to watch some of the other San Francisco entries to the Hay House contest, as well. Many of them have important messages from other Movers and Shakers.

I would love for my good news to prompt YOU to take positive action to maximize your ROLE. So let me ask you a question: What is it that you’ve been wanting to do for a long time, but haven’t started on? Something that you dream about, that really lights you up? Instead of trying to figure out the path to getting there, I want to suggest something daring:  Let your head go! Yep, stop spinning in your mind about the “right” thing to do. Quit trying to plan step #38.

Instead, listen to your heart. Ask your heart” What’s one small, small step that I could take toward my dream?” Give yourself a dose of love, and then listen with compassion to what your heart tells you. Perhaps it’s signing up for a class. Maybe you’ll want to call a friend for support. Possibly it’s writing your dream in a journal and seeing what new information emerges. These are just a few suggestions. You’ve got your own wisdom within you. So, “work from within,” and listen inside yourself for your own next step, the next place to dip a toe in the water, to take a leap of faith, to run after what you desire, to reach for what you want.

As I see it, dreams are your spirit’s way of communicating what you truly desire. Don’t discount them. Ever! Nurture and feed them, which means shining the light of loving care on yourself. This is part of the journey of being a Mover & Shaker.

Here’s to your dreams!

Susan

Last night, I went to the gym. I almost didn’t feel like I had a choice. The non-stop rain here in the Bay Area is getting to my mood. Sorry, but I grew up in the Phoenix area. Still have desert blood in me. So when the clouds hang low, dark, and gloomy, I find it harder to stay upbeat. Getting my endorphins pumping gives me a boost of positive energy for at least 8 hours.

I heard the rain pick up at about 5:40 pm, and knew I needed to dash to my car to make the 6 pm spin class. With no traffic, the drive takes me 10 minutes, but in rush hour, it can be 15, and even 20 with bad weather. So I grabbed my backpack, filled it with biking shorts, a tank top, and a pair of socks, and figured I’d change in the dressing room.

Because the spin room holds only 20 bikes, you have to grab a number if you want a bike. I arrived and grabbed number 20. Whew. I’d made it. I was safe.

I changed my clothes, and then went to grab my running shoes (I still haven’t bought biking shoes, the clip in kind, despite some advice that I’d get more out of the class). “Where are my sneakers?” Hmm…oh…crap!

In my rush to get out of the house, I neglected to bring appropriate shoes. No, I was not going to try to bike in a pair of knee-high boots. Argh! My blood pressure started to rise. Just then, my friend Catherine walked up. She was leaving the gym. She wondered why I looked so steamed. I had not been in the sauna — the flush on my face was the tell-tale sign of anger. Catherine told me she would have given me her running shoes to wear, but she had been swimming and didn’t have any. I laughed at the thought. My shoe size is 4 1/2, but I can wear a 5. Hers is 8. Hmmm….

“Hey, why don’t you borrow my shoes?” came a voice moving around the corner. A very gracious woman, Michelene, offered her size 6 Sauconys. “You can cycle in these.” I realized I didn’t need perfect fitting shoes for pedaling, especially with the toe cages on the bike. I couldn’t believe her offer. My feet don’t get that smelly (well, the scent is just perfume to me…yeah, right…), but I was just incredulous. Michelene was firm and supportive, “I know how hard it is to not work out. Please, borrow these. You can leave them at the front desk and I’ll get them tomorrow night.”

“Wow, wow, thank you. OK, yes, having some shoes for the bike would let me get my sanity back. What can I do to thank you?” I asked.

“Just pay it forward.”

I think I had the most idyllic spin class, ever. I was high as a kite, fueled by the generosity of a stranger. I joined my gym because I found it more like a community, not just a place to sweat. Michelene proved to me that community works. She must know something about being a team player. I asked her for her business card so I could be in touch and thank her, and it turns out that she’s the Director of Sales & Finance for Parties That Cook. I was floored. I know about her amazing company. One of my clients has been dabbling in culinary explorations, and I suggested she check out Parties That Cook, which puts on corporate team building cooking events — they cook up camaraderie!

But I digress.

When I finished the spin class, I changed clothes and went to the front desk, “I have a very important favor to ask of you,” I told Julie, the assistant who manages the guests. After conveying what had happened, and how important that it was that the shoes stay at the front desk until Michelene picked them up, rather than going to the lost and found bin. Julie beamed and said, “You made my day with that story. I’ll call Michelene and let her know, right now, that her shoes are safe. That’s so generous of her. Wow, that’s really incredible.”

I know. I feel it in every bone in my body, every inch of my tissue. My heart is uplifted and is pumping much more smoothly. My head is clear.

Thank you, Michelene, for your kind spirit. You made my day.

Yes, I’ll happily pay it forward. And remind my dear readers to do so, too.

Hoping you’ll help someone else step up and make their best moves,
Dr. Susan Bernstein
Life/Work Transition Expert
www.WorkFromWithin.com

This morning felt a little nutty, with a client emergency, a cell phone that kept dropping calls, and a washing machine that made an awful sound. In the midst of all of this, I realized I hadn't had breakfast yet! Ooops!  Ever had a day like that?  How did you stay upbeat?

Fortunately for me, I was able to stay positive and motivated because I had a phone call already planned with Kyra Cavanaugh, from Life Meets Work. We set up a time this morning to talk about what's happening in the economy, and why we think that there's actually a lot to be happy about and how people can stay positive and upbeat, even when the Dow is down.

We've had so much fun talking with each other over the few months that we've been acquainted, and realized we had a ton of inspiration and education to share.  So we planned to record a friendly conversation to share with our readers (now, listeners). 

I hope you enjoy listening as much as we enjoyed sharing our ideas, which include:

• Opening up to new job possibilities, so you don't get locked in by your industry or function
• Finding flexible work options (Kyra reminds us that those are more attractive than ever)
• Doing what's important to keep your job or get a new one
• Ways to do contract work
• The positive good that's being created in our current economy
• The need for cooperation and community, instead of competition

We'd both love you to post your comments. This creates community, fosters conversation, and lets us know what else we can provide for you.

Happy listening!
Susan

Dr. Susan Bernstein
Coach, Speaker & Author
www.WorkFromWithin.com
Work From Within, LLC

 When it's time for a change, do you feel compelled to "go it alone"? You know, that "I can do it myself," super independent streak?

I know I felt I had to make changes on my own.  Even by myself.  

I'll be honest.  For the last few months of 2008, I was feeling depressed.  As in "pressed down."  I felt "small."  In my heart, I knew I had bigger work to do in the world.  It's not that I don't love the career transition work that I do with people through Work from Within.  I get rave reviews from my clients, and I truly create meaningful bonds that last with them, long beyond our coaching relationship.

No, I just felt it in my gut, that I was playing too small a game.  That I needed to break out of the limiting container of being a "career coach."  In fact, when people would introduce me as a career coach, my skin would crawl.  
Like I wanted to peel that name off of me, like a snake shedding her skin. 

It was time for something new.

But what? 

continue

I just bought a new Flip Mino HD video and with the help of my friend (and great financial planner), Celeste Mirassou, we shot a quick holiday video for you.

You see, I don't want you to get caught in the doom and gloom of things like foreclosures, financial losses, and layoffs.

It's time for a message of hope.

I believe what's essential right now, to keep on the positive side of life, are three things: Connections, celebration, and seeing creative possibilities.

I hope you enjoy this very simple message, home-spun, low-tech, and authentically from my heart.

How this message makes you feel?  What does it inspire you to do or express in 2009?  Go ahead, express yourself!  Post a comment with your thoughts and impressions.

Celebrating your divine spark,

Susan

Dr. Susan Bernstein
Coach, Speaker & Author
www.WorkFromWithin.com
Work From Within, LLC

Yesterday, I was sitting in a workshop and kept getting emYesterday, I was sitting in a workshop and kept getting emails from friends saying, "I saw your name on TV." I was confused, because they didn't say, "I saw YOU on TV." 

So, I shot back emails asking for more details.  Turns out that reporter Len Ramirez featured a story on CBS5 news on Monday night about how LinkedIn is helping unemployed people to find jobs. 
So, if you watch the video, you'll see at one minute, thirty five
seconds into the coverage (1:35) that my name shows up in a story about
LinkedIn job seeker David Stevens.  Voila!  My two seconds of fame. 

You
don't see my adorable mug hamming it up for the camera.  You even don't
see a picture of me.  You just see my name and a network update, "Dr. Susan Bernstein is now connected to Kim Fisher."

Why does all of this matter?

I
share this to tell you the "behind the scenes" story of how this all
came to be.  Not because I want you to know about my fame — this is
not exactly Oprah-worthy news, after all.  No, it's because I want you to know how LinkedIn made this all possible, so that you can use LinkedIn, too, in innovative ways.

Flash
back about three months ago.  I wanted to learn about ways to build
publicity for my business.  In particular, I wanted to know how to
build media connections that might be useful one day. 

First aha – Use LinkedIn Q&A to pose questions to a bunch of people!  I had a question, and I could either post it on LinkedIn Q&A or I could search for an expert in my network.  In this case, I didn't wind up doing either of those. 

Second aha – Check out Q&A — because you never know when you'll find someone useful to you!  I happened to also be looking for information on networking, and saw in the Q&A section that David Stevens (who worked for a radio TV station in a PR capacity). had answered a question on myths and misconceptions about networking that Krista Canfield had asked. Instead of posting one or more questions on Q&A (when I didn't really know what questions I'd want to ask), David's reply made me think I might be able to have an extended conversation with him about media PR!  At the time, he was a Marketing Solutions Provider at
NextMedia Group.  

I decided I wanted to get in touch with David.  So I sent a request for
introduction to Krista Canfield.  She's always been amazingly gracious
and helpful, and I figured she'd help facilitate the introduction. 
And, as I usually find on LinkedIn, the connection was successful, and
David was only too happy to talk to me about media PR.  He called me
and we spoke for nearly an hour.  I got some vital insights from our
conversation, thanked David, and told him that if I could be of
assistance to him, I'd be happy to return the favor.  We joined each
other's LinkedIn network so we could stay in touch.

Third aha –what goes around, comes around. Just a few weeks later, David sent me a note saying, "You
said if there was ever anything you could do for me you would be happy
to."  Although I didn't know David well, I loved his enthusiasm and his
assistance, so I wrote something honest, "“I asked David for some perspective on radio PR, and he was extremely
knowledgeable and helpful. He gave me some interesting insights as I
learn more about this media.” 

Fourth aha – getting recommendations can help you get a job…or at least get attention. 
As I suspected, David was being wise as he saw that his job was coming
to an end, and he gathered recommendations so that a future employer
would be able to learn more about him.  Sure enough, he found his next
job through LinkedIn, as the Channel 5 news about his job search success story makes clear.  

I
truly love success stories like this.  I'm a self-proclaimed "power user" of LinkedIn,
and I estimate that upwards of 60% of my clients find me through
LinkedIn.  I'd love to show you how to leverage LinkedIn in your job search…whether
you're conducting a job search right now, or anticipate that you'll
need to be on your toes about using LinkedIn in the near future.  On
Thursday, November 13, from 6-8 pm Pacific, I'm offering a webinar, Using LinkedIn Strategically in Your Job
Search. 
It's very reasonably priced, and 88% of the people who attended this
same webinar on October 22 were "very satisfied" with the content. 
C'mon, check out the details — and start using LinkedIn much more strategically, with better results!

Happy linking!

Susan

Dr. Susan Bernstein
Job Search Coach & Founder
The Job Search Gym
www.JobSearchGym.com

If you feel held hostage by your job, it may because of the mortgage you are carrying.  I watched one client brave a 2-hour commute, each way, to work, just so she and her husband could afford their home in the San Francisco Bay area.  I'm sorry, but that's nuts.  Spending four hours a day, five days a week in your car, just so you have have the so-called American dream of owning a home?  Shoot, she had very little time with her husband and they were constantly stressed out.  They both felt fearful that they would lose their jobs, because they knew that meant they could lose their homes.  It's awful to be tied to your job just so you can keep a roof over your house that happens to have your name on the title.  What ever happened to renting?  What ever happened to reasonable living accomodations?

Do you want to unleash yourself from an employer or a job you hate?  Your ticket may be in downsizing your home.  I know.  I've done it.  When I was married, my then-husband and I owned a 4-bedroom, 4-bath 2400 square foot house in a chic San Francisco neighborhood.  Did we need that much space?  Well, we figured that we'd have kids, eventually.  Sadly, we split up instead.  But now, I rent a home with less than 900 square feet.  It's a 2-bedroom place where one bedroom is my office.  But I could live in much smaller quarters, and not just because I'm petite.

I'm always appalled when I go to visit my parents in the Phoenix area. 
The homes near them are monstrosities.  My parents home, at 3000 square feet, is the dwarf in the neighborhood.  I even saw one mega-mansion under construction
there during my last trip.  It was three stories high, with one
story built underground to circumvent the local restrictions on
building more than two stories.  I hate to imagine how much power it
takes to air condition such palaces in the midst of the desert, and how
much work it takes to keep the manicured lawns looking good.  Excuse
me, but this excess does not take into account the long-term impact on
our economy.

Fortunately, the financial craziness we're experiencing has lots of people getting creative and scaling back.  I especially love the movement to smaller homes.  It's good for the economy, it's good for our sanity, and it's good for the environment.

CNN ran a story on living in 100 square feet of bliss.  I invite you to consider this move to less — for giving you more.  I know I am.  And, I'm also looking into co-housing, a movement of bringing people together in communities.  They own their own homes, plus a common space, and they all spend time pitching in to cook and do other things for each other.  In our age of isolation, this is a solace, and one that can often be more affordable.

What other options are you considering to untether yourself from the ball and chain of a mortgage that's keeping you tied to work that you don't enjoy?

Pondering with you,

Susan

Dr. Susan Bernstein
Coach, Speaker & Author

www.WorkFromWithin.com

Work From Within, LLC

I recently called a representative, Jonathan, at Charles Schwab, where I have whatever happens to be left of my investment account.  I was only half joking when I asked Jonathan if he was taking Tums and scarfing down aspirin.  The current market nuttiness is enough to upset any stomach and create significant headaches. 

But, it doesn't have to be that way.  At least not as I see…or feel it. 

While I've had my moments of wanting to bury myself under the covers and not come out until this market mess is over, I hold a lot of hope.  In this current unpredictability, I've discovered that my recent PhD in somatic psychology (aka mind-body psychology) is way more valuable in addressing our uncertain times than my MBA.  Why?  Because somatic psychology addresses how we respond to shock and trauma, and has proven tools to help people regain their inner compass. 

From the mind-body psychology perspective, most people have one of four responses to shock and trauma: fight, flight, freeze, or faint.

In terms of fighting, I see a lot of people wasting a lot of time pointing fingers and laying blame for the economic mess. That provides only temporary relief, and in terms of emotional contagion, fighting spreads insidious, unproductive anger. Some people catastrophize and want to take flight, and have the urge to pull totally out of the market. Especially if you have more than fifteen years until retirement, you'll want to think twice before gambling on a big sell off. Another response is to freeze, and just get paralyzed, unable to do anything, due to fear. That doesn't leave you much room to respond. Finally, fainting is to collapse and play dead. Hmm, being non-responsive seems unwise.

So, what to do. First, I'm not going to get on my b-school soapbox and advise you what to do with your money and investments. But I do think it's a good idea to inoculate yourself against the fear that the media generates by reducing your diet of stories about the current situation. Don't stay uninformed, but don't adopt one of the four shock and trauma responses. Instead, I want to advocate four healthy responses to the current tumultous market gyrations:

Get conscious.
Get connected.
Get courageous.
Get calm.

Get conscious about your money. Not just how you budget and spend it. But also about your habits around finances. We all have unconscious patterns in how we act around financial matters. We need to integrate our "shadow" selves, in Carl Jung's terms. Around money, those patterns tend to be: acting naively, not acting at all, becoming victims of circumstances, going to "war" with imagined "enemies" over economic situations, adopting a martyr stance, gambling, falling into pseudo-spiritual patterns of acting as if money doesn’t matter at all, or oppressing others with money. When you become aware of your tendencies, as uncomfortable as they may be, you're able to shift them. And instead of acting unconsciously, you can learn about money and investments. And you can discover how to use your skills and talents to transform and manifest your own financial reality.  I've written more about this in a posting about money coaching.

Get connected to community. We humans are wired for connection, and we especially need it in times of change. Actually, we're wired for connection, While connecting virtually is nice, there's nothing like the in-person handshake or hug to let someone know you care. Do something nice for someone. Take a genuine interest in the people around you. Not just for selfish reasons, so you can get a job if your company lays you off in the next few months. But for the long-run, so that you're not alone. This is a great time to go to industry events and mixers, and to join in social events that interest you. Find "your peeps" so you know you have places where you belong.

Get courageous. Look, if (and that's a very big if) everything is going to hell in a handbasket, why not take that risk you've always wanted to take? Especially if that risk still allows you to take care of your basic physiological and safety needs, ala Maslow's Hierarchy of Needs. And, even if the world's not going to hell, this is a vital time to stand out. Make your mark. Be visible and show initiative. Start up a project or effort that really matters to the bottom line, where you’ll help improve profitability, productivity, or time to market. If you don’t know what that might be, ask your customers or your management about the biggest problems they face, and help them to find solutions. Do this using skills you enjoy using. And assert your boundaries so that you are not putting in tons of overtime. Manage your energy, not just your time.

And finally, get calm. Breathe. In and out. Slow and deep, instead of the fast and shallow way we usually do when we're stressed. Fortunately, breathing is one of the things that happens automatically. Thank goodness we don't have to put in on our "to do" list every day! But, we're seldom aware of our breath. And it's an amazing resource for getting calm. Set up a ritual to do nine slow, deep inhalations and exhalations every 30 minutes. When you're feeling fearful, your breathing capacity can drop 30% or more, which means you're cutting off oxygen supply to your brain, and your thinking gets fuzzier. You can clear your mind with meditation, too. It's a great way of helping you to release non-essential thoughts and get grounded and centered. No, you don't have to shave your head and wear flowing robes to practice. You can start by focusing on your in and out breath and compassionately noticing and naming your thoughts as they drift through your mind.

I've come to understand that despite my desire to control everything, uncertainty is a constant in life. These four principles have helped me to weather some pretty intense times in my own life.

I also want to offer you a FREE resource for helping you to weather the ups and downs of the market, and their impacts on the job market, your financial life, and your inner sense of well-being.  I invite you to sign up to receive access to a one-hour teleclass I recorded on creating inner security in times of uncertainty.  You'll also get a handout filled with more tips on staying sane in trying times. 

Hey, how about helping out our other readers?  I bet you have ways that you're coping with the current market mania.  What are YOU doing to cope with economic stress and uncertainty?

Wishing you consciousness, connection, courage and calm,
Susan

Dr. Susan Bernstein
Coach, Speaker & Author

www.WorkFromWithin.com

Work From Within, LLC

I'm excited to introduce you to Jenna Mahina, who left work as a community relations program manager at a Silicon Valley high-tech company to become an artist and workshop leader.  This high-energy woman has charm and chutzpah, all rolled up into a fun package.  She's all about igniting and celebrating authenticity. 

But, for a while, Jenna felt really stuck in work that she was good at — but no longer loved.  She looked into her heart and took a leap of faith.  Faith in herself and a positive outcome.  And she's loving her new life, outside the toil of seemingly non-stop meetings and activities that no longer challenged her nor held meaning.  It was time for a change, and Jenna listened to the voice within that told her to move along. 

Here's a bit of Jenna's story:

How did you get into your former career as a community relations program manager?

As early as age 7
when I did the March of Dimes Walk-a-thon, I always loved helping people. 
I was already doing the job as a volunteer for several years and insisting the
company make a formal role for me.  As the saying goes, “the squeaky wheel
get the oil.”

Jenna, what did you dislike about your former career?

A lot of the tasks I was skilled at, enjoyed doing and that kept me
happy at my job were replaced by meetings where I discussed what other people
did.  Also because of the change in responsibilities I lost the one-on-one
interactions with employees, which was a large part of what made my job
meaningful to me.

So what was your impetus for change?

In the year leading up to the change, I had a lot of personal
challenges.  As I reflected on what was important to me, I realized that
my current career didn’t allow for a life that balanced my whole self.  I
wanted more freedom to focus on things that are important to all aspects of who
I am, not just work.

What are you doing now?

I’m exploring many aspects of my creativity!  I started a venture called Intoxicated Soul, and have been selling my artwork there, as well as at my local farmer’s market.  Intoxicated Soul is a vehicle for my photography and my workshops.  It's also an e-commerce site and I write my own blog.  People can also find out about the empowering workshops I lead, including one I'm offering on September 20 at Fort Mason in San Francisco, called Autumn Soulebration: Celebrating Our True Selves.   It's a time to laugh, share, giggle, envision, eat and celebrate the abundance of the autumn season.

And, I'm simply doing more things that I love, like swimming with whales, going ATV quadding for the first time in a year, spending more time at the ocean, and being with my family.

What do you love about what you are doing now?

I love the freedom — of my schedule, my time, and who I spent my time with.  I also love having the ability to express my creativity freely.  And, I'm proud of my courage to step outside my comfort zone.

I love how inspiring Jenna is!  She loves dwelling in what's possible.  I've seen that when she runs into an obstacle, she turns it around…or rolls over it, like in the ATVs (all-terrain vehicles…four-wheelers) she loves to ride. 

Thanks, Jenna, for inspiring all of us! 

YOU can meet Jenna!   She's part of a panel discussion called

Follow a More Authentic Career Path. 

Date:  Wednesday, September 10, 2008
Time:  6:30 pm – 9:30 pm
Location:  San Francisco's Fort Mason.
Registration:  $55.   Ensure your space by registering online.

Hope to meet you there!  You can also meet others who've made big career changes, including Jeff Kennedy (attorney to HR consultant), Todd Kelly (tax manager to marketing consultant) and Ande Scheinker (event planner to culinary explorer).

Celebrating change!

Susan

Dr. Susan Bernstein
Coach, Speaker & Author

www.WorkFromWithin.com

Work From Within, LLC