Last night, I went to the gym. I almost didn’t feel like I had a choice. The non-stop rain here in the Bay Area is getting to my mood. Sorry, but I grew up in the Phoenix area. Still have desert blood in me. So when the clouds hang low, dark, and gloomy, I find it harder to stay upbeat. Getting my endorphins pumping gives me a boost of positive energy for at least 8 hours.

I heard the rain pick up at about 5:40 pm, and knew I needed to dash to my car to make the 6 pm spin class. With no traffic, the drive takes me 10 minutes, but in rush hour, it can be 15, and even 20 with bad weather. So I grabbed my backpack, filled it with biking shorts, a tank top, and a pair of socks, and figured I’d change in the dressing room.

Because the spin room holds only 20 bikes, you have to grab a number if you want a bike. I arrived and grabbed number 20. Whew. I’d made it. I was safe.

I changed my clothes, and then went to grab my running shoes (I still haven’t bought biking shoes, the clip in kind, despite some advice that I’d get more out of the class). “Where are my sneakers?” Hmm…oh…crap!

In my rush to get out of the house, I neglected to bring appropriate shoes. No, I was not going to try to bike in a pair of knee-high boots. Argh! My blood pressure started to rise. Just then, my friend Catherine walked up. She was leaving the gym. She wondered why I looked so steamed. I had not been in the sauna — the flush on my face was the tell-tale sign of anger. Catherine told me she would have given me her running shoes to wear, but she had been swimming and didn’t have any. I laughed at the thought. My shoe size is 4 1/2, but I can wear a 5. Hers is 8. Hmmm….

“Hey, why don’t you borrow my shoes?” came a voice moving around the corner. A very gracious woman, Michelene, offered her size 6 Sauconys. “You can cycle in these.” I realized I didn’t need perfect fitting shoes for pedaling, especially with the toe cages on the bike. I couldn’t believe her offer. My feet don’t get that smelly (well, the scent is just perfume to me…yeah, right…), but I was just incredulous. Michelene was firm and supportive, “I know how hard it is to not work out. Please, borrow these. You can leave them at the front desk and I’ll get them tomorrow night.”

“Wow, wow, thank you. OK, yes, having some shoes for the bike would let me get my sanity back. What can I do to thank you?” I asked.

“Just pay it forward.”

I think I had the most idyllic spin class, ever. I was high as a kite, fueled by the generosity of a stranger. I joined my gym because I found it more like a community, not just a place to sweat. Michelene proved to me that community works. She must know something about being a team player. I asked her for her business card so I could be in touch and thank her, and it turns out that she’s the Director of Sales & Finance for Parties That Cook. I was floored. I know about her amazing company. One of my clients has been dabbling in culinary explorations, and I suggested she check out Parties That Cook, which puts on corporate team building cooking events — they cook up camaraderie!

But I digress.

When I finished the spin class, I changed clothes and went to the front desk, “I have a very important favor to ask of you,” I told Julie, the assistant who manages the guests. After conveying what had happened, and how important that it was that the shoes stay at the front desk until Michelene picked them up, rather than going to the lost and found bin. Julie beamed and said, “You made my day with that story. I’ll call Michelene and let her know, right now, that her shoes are safe. That’s so generous of her. Wow, that’s really incredible.”

I know. I feel it in every bone in my body, every inch of my tissue. My heart is uplifted and is pumping much more smoothly. My head is clear.

Thank you, Michelene, for your kind spirit. You made my day.

Yes, I’ll happily pay it forward. And remind my dear readers to do so, too.

Hoping you’ll help someone else step up and make their best moves,
Dr. Susan Bernstein
Life/Work Transition Expert
www.WorkFromWithin.com

I admire the people who come to the workshops I facilitate, like the Crafting Careers That Truly Fit workshop that I’m teaching at the relaxing Esalen Institute in Big Sur, California from January 15 to 17, 2010. It takes courage to face your frustrations with work that doesn’t fit, bravery to get clear about what you want instead, and faith to pursue a new direction. And yet that’s the space that I hold for people, to be able to have a breakthrough, to release work that no longer works, and to truly embrace a new, more inspiring trajectory. I love doing it…and it gets results.

So, what about those results? What happens for people when they go through a workshop like Crafting Careers That Truly Fit? Well, let me share with you a note that I received very recently from a participant in the October 2009 offering of that workshop.

“Dear Susan,

I wanted to let you know that I had a great experience at your workshop and am so glad I went.

Being unappreciated, overworked and underpaid is draining and discouraging and I was at a real low point in my confidence and self worth.

I had a couple of interesting epiphanies during the workshop, but doing one of them in particular not only gave me back my sense of self but completely surprised and delighted me. I never realized or I guess acknowledged my own skills, talents and accomplishments and I couldn’t believe how many I had.  So many things that I contribute and am great at. The experience filled my heart with light and pride. I walked away with the realization that I felt/feel really good about myself and my abilities deep in my heart and not being acknowledged or appreciated at work doesn’t change that.

Real, true internal validation in the purest sense is priceless.

It was also really recharging for me to be around you and all the amazing people in the workshop and spend time focusing on myself.

Thank you, thank you, thank you.”

This note warms my heart. I am so, so, so happy for the participant who wrote it. It’s true that “being unappreciated, overworked and underpaid is draining and discouraging,” and yet people settle for mediocre working situations all the time. It does take energy and effort to move out of these situations. The Crafting Careers That Truly Fit workshop is designed to:

• Help you not only become aware of what’s not working — but to transform those elements into what you truly desire.
• Give the opportunity to discover how to move from a draining career to an energizing career, and you’ll get directionally clearer on what that career might be
• Bring together your skills, talents, and abilities to form new possibilities for work
• Redefine work in a way that’s truly meaningful, uplifting, and actionable
• Get you unstuck and moving in a direction that truly fits for you

I’d love to have YOU (yes, you!) join this workshop. If you have questions, please feel free to email me at Info @ WorkFromWithin.com or contact me through the Work from Within website.

And, as a early-bird special bonus for you – if you register with Esalen for this workshop before January 1, 2010, I’ll give you a free coaching session and a deck of the Get A Move On! cards, worth over $250! Be sure to read the details of this offer, and contact Esalen (or call them at 831-667-3000) to sign up for the workshop TODAY! Take action now, so that you ensure your space. It’s a great way to start off 2010 with a new confidence about your career, your self-esteem, and your future.

Come join us & craft work that truly fits YOU!
Susan

Dr. Susan Bernstein
Life/Work Transition Expert
www.WorkFromWithin.com

Happy Thanksgiving!

As we move towards the Winter Solstice, and the hours of sunlight grow shorter and shorter, this is a great time of year to turn inward and notice the people and circumstances for which we are most grateful.

I encourage you to express gratitude and thanksgiving to at least three people this week…and notice how you feel inside.  What emotions do you feel? How do you feel in your body? Perhaps you will feel love arising…not necessarily mushy, sentimental love, but a more universal feeling.

Pay close attention those positive feelings and sensations. Savor them. And then set an intention to spread those good feelings to your work. You might imagine a that the positive energy is like a mist and it spreads gently, touching any element of your life that needs to come into the light, some situation or relationship that is calling out for greater meaning and fulfillment. Then, exhale, and release the outcome. You might write down any insights or “aha’s” in a journal, and track what happens.

When you transform your feelings about a difficult issue or relationship, you “work from within” to regain your sense of impact. Instead of feeling so stuck, focusing on any positive aspect, even if it seems teeny, helps you to feel better and open up new possibilities. While you may not get exactly the outcome you expect, practice being grateful (even to the person or situation for being an extremely challenging teacher) and you are very likely to generate new choices. You fuel positive change with positive energy.

Your emotions and sensations are novel and original in each moment. So by allowing yourself to focus on positive aspects of in any moment, and feeling and sensing our own well-being, we transform our brains so that new neural pathways are created, instead of being “stuck in a rut.”

Maybe, just maybe, these suggestions will allow you to experience what the poet Khalil Gibran said of work…“Work is love, made visible.”

I’d love to hear how this works for you! Drop me at line at Info@WorkFromWithin.com

Happy Thanksgiving!
Susan

Dr. Susan Bernstein
Life/Work Transition Expert
www.WorkFromWithin.com

PS – If you’d like to get out of a rut about your career, I invite you to read about the January 15 – 17, 2010 workshop I’m teaching at the Esalen Institute.

Just found this quote today, from Marcus Aurelius, last of the Five Good Emperors of the Roman Empire: 

That sums up how I feel about life coming together when you work from within.  The optimal way to navigate change and chaos, as I see and feel it, is from within. Rely on yourself, on your inner wisdom.  And, as the sage Marcus Aurelius advised, "dig still deeper & deeper" to touch that innate, embodied intelligence.

May you find hope as you look within,
Susan

Susan Bernstein, MBA PhD
Coach, Author, Speaker
www.WorkFromWithin.com
It all comes together when you work from within

“I got a job!”

I love those words. Especially because I’m so sick of hearing all the employment reports that are filled with gloom and doom. Words and phrases like “crisis,” and “massive layoffs,” and “unprecedented increase in unemployment” are more than a downer.  They induce hopelessness and defeat.

So, out of my utter frustration, and because I am bound and determined to be a ray of hope for people in their job search, I am taking a stand for the positive. It’s time to celebrate.  It’s time to share the good news.  We all need some encouragement!

I ask you, if you have gotten a job, or if you know someone who’s gotten a job, to please post your story (as a comment) here.  Include your name and the job you got.  And how you feel to have your new job.

By posting that “I got a job” and sharing a little bit about it, not only will you be able to brag, you’ll be able to help job seekers to know that it’s still quite possible to get a job.

So, please do share your “I got a job!” stories here.  Your success can have a positive impact on a lot of people.

Thanks!
Susan

Susan Bernstein, MBA PhD
Coach I Author I Speaker
Work from Within, LLC
www.WorkFromWithin.com
It all comes together when you work from within

I'm sorry.   I've been out of touch.  I've felt a little sad that I haven't been writing this blog in weeks.  This isn't the only communication channel that I've neglected. I've also missed sending tweets from my Twitter account. 

In the midst of this creative cyclone, I'm totally caught in the round and round motion of a whole new landscape of thoughts and ideas.  For now, I happen to be immersed in the murky waters of a not-yet-clear soup that I'll call "mind-body-spirit transformation soup."  I'm not sure of all the ingredient.  I think some are missing.  I have a bunch more possible limp bits of goo I could add, but I wish I had more formed, delicious morsels to serve up.  Somehow, I sense I'm cooking up a stew.  It's not ready for tasting, but it's getting close.  A nasty, nagging naysayer in my noggin,' who reminds me of a Siberian grandmother (complete with kerchief), but with a Bronx accent, chides me:

I look askew and reply "Hey, I'm in process!"  I get kind of defensive. I have to be forceful with this nagging naysayer.  Her logic is strong.  I do need money. (We all do, of course) I get nervous when her voice shows up in my mental missives.  She reminds me of everyone who's been asking:

"What are you up to?" and "Well, what's that new direction your business is taking you?" 

I translate all of that into greater pressure to produce — now!  The nagging naysayer is telling me now, as I write this, "You should be writing something else."  In my mind's eye, I am clothed in white temple garb.  I look back at her, bow, and reply:

"Thank you.  But the blog calls.  I want to write it.  I also want to work on the the workbook.  Just not now."

She shakes her head, some of her hair tumbles out of the kerchief as she rolls her eyes and remarks, "Whatever." 

I know she's sarcastic.  She doesn't sincerely want to accept "whatever" I want to do. She's not OK with my choice. But I choose to ignore her for now.  It's time to trust my instincts and desires.  I know it in my bones. 

My precious Soul Motion dance teacher, Zuza Engler, this past Tuesday night, shared some lines of poetry that feel fit for sharing.  These words help me to understand who I am, even in the midst of change.  They are about "the thread," that goes through my life.  You have your thread, too.  So does everyone.

I thought you'd enjoy these words, this poem.  Especially when you can't quite articulate to others where you're going or what you're doing, may these words give you comfort.

The Way It Is

There’s a thread you follow.
It goes among
things that change.  But it doesn’t change.
People
wonder about what you are pursuing.
You have to explain about the
thread.
But it is hard for others to see.
While you hold it you can’t get
lost.
Tragedies happen; people get hurt
or die; and you suffer and get
old.
Nothing you do can stop time’s unfolding.
You don’t ever let go of
the thread.

~ William Stafford

I wonder how that poem touches you?

Weaving my world with yours,
Susan

Dr. Susan Bernstein
Coach, Speaker & Author
www.WorkFromWithin.com
Work From Within, LLC

 When it's time for a change, do you feel compelled to "go it alone"? You know, that "I can do it myself," super independent streak?

I know I felt I had to make changes on my own.  Even by myself.  

I'll be honest.  For the last few months of 2008, I was feeling depressed.  As in "pressed down."  I felt "small."  In my heart, I knew I had bigger work to do in the world.  It's not that I don't love the career transition work that I do with people through Work from Within.  I get rave reviews from my clients, and I truly create meaningful bonds that last with them, long beyond our coaching relationship.

No, I just felt it in my gut, that I was playing too small a game.  That I needed to break out of the limiting container of being a "career coach."  In fact, when people would introduce me as a career coach, my skin would crawl.  
Like I wanted to peel that name off of me, like a snake shedding her skin. 

It was time for something new.

But what? 

continue

I just bought a new Flip Mino HD video and with the help of my friend (and great financial planner), Celeste Mirassou, we shot a quick holiday video for you.

You see, I don't want you to get caught in the doom and gloom of things like foreclosures, financial losses, and layoffs.

It's time for a message of hope.

I believe what's essential right now, to keep on the positive side of life, are three things: Connections, celebration, and seeing creative possibilities.

I hope you enjoy this very simple message, home-spun, low-tech, and authentically from my heart.

How this message makes you feel?  What does it inspire you to do or express in 2009?  Go ahead, express yourself!  Post a comment with your thoughts and impressions.

Celebrating your divine spark,

Susan

Dr. Susan Bernstein
Coach, Speaker & Author
www.WorkFromWithin.com
Work From Within, LLC

This morning, a friend sent me an inspiring blog posting by the writer Alice Walker on The Root, with an open letter to Barack Obama.  What touched me most about her posting is that she implored Barack Obama "to cultivate happiness in your own life." 

I love that Walker suggested that Obama just relax, because of the benefits that others will see.  Specifically, Walker said:

I've always been a big fan of self care, and have even shared my own practices for re-energizing and renewal.  And just a few weeks ago, I had the pleasure of studying with leadership coach Dave Ellis, who quoted Dee Hock, founder and former CEO of the VISA credit card association:

I also like how Dave Ellis illustrates this concept, using a balloon.  Dave encourages us to fill ourselves up, which means to do the things we really love, and then to give ourselves away.  But not fully away, of course.  Because then we'd be like limp balloons, empty, void.  How much fun is that?

So, what do you think of giving Obama the time, as Alice Walker suggests, to relax and renew with his family?  Do you agree without time to fill himself up, our next president will be "strained and stressed?" Might Obama avoid the fate of other leaders who, in Walker's words "have smiles so lacking in joy that they remind us of scissors?"

And what are you doing in your own life to fill yourself up?

Me?  I'm going for a quick walk before my next coaching call.

With care,
Susan

Dr. Susan Bernstein
Coach, Speaker & Author

www.WorkFromWithin.com

Work From Within, LLC

I don't usually like to forward along advice I get through chain mail letters, but this one really gets to me, especially with the elections today, and the whole idea of staying positive in the midst of uncertainty.  My thanks go out to my dear friend, Gabrielle Saveri, for forwarding this on.  I regret that I don't know the original author, so I send my heartfelt appreciation to that person for sharing this. 

A 92-year-old, petite, well-poised and proud man, who is fully dressed each morning by eight o'clock, with his hair fashionably combed and shaved perfectly, even though he is legally blind, moved to a nursing home today. His wife of 70 years recently passed away, making the move necessary. After many hours of waiting patiently in the lobby of the nursing home, he smiled sweetly when told his room was ready.

Honestly, I don't particularly care if this story is true or not.  It's about the philosophy.  What a radical idea to arrange your mind to see the positive.   And gosh, for me, it just feels good.  For more on staying positive, check out the Positive Psychology Center at University of Pennsylvania.

Wishing you a positive life,
Susan

Dr. Susan Bernstein
Coach, Speaker & Author

www.WorkFromWithin.com

Work From Within, LLC